they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
Randomize
