my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Randomize
