I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
god damn woman. you are like the herpes of drunk texting. you never go away.
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
