I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
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