Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
I will be naked everywhere
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize
