At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
Randomize
