Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
He has the fingertips of a God
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