i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
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