Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
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