does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
Randomize
