i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
Randomize