i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
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