hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
Randomize
