im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.
Stop texting me, I'm right here.
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
Randomize
