so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Randomize