is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
Don't make this awkward for me. Don't let your mom come near the bathroom. I can't meet your mom for the first time while I'm shitting. Dont make this awkward.
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
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