O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
We don't watch enough power rangers
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
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