her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
My liver is preforming stress tests.
Randomize
