But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
i will replace your cream cheese. there's enough for breakfast. you are my friend. i had guests we wanted bagels so bad im sorry. i left you notes. i love you. you have enough for a bagel or two and i will get you more. you are so pretty.
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
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