ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
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