Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
Randomize
