Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
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