even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
Randomize
