that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
Randomize
