And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
I need water and some morals
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
Randomize
