Plan B is the new Plan A
i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
Randomize
