Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
