help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Randomize
