Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
Randomize
