you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize
