I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
I could make wine with my vomit
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
Randomize
