Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
Randomize
