# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
Sacagawea was the original milf.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
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