...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
Reason #3 women are better than men: texting and peeing simultaneously. Write THAT in the fucking snow.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
Randomize
