dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
My mom is getting really tired of hearing the excuse 'it's 5 oclock somewhere'
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
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