I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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