She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
Randomize
