Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
Randomize
