Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
