that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
