hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
I wish there were whore gnomes that cleaned our apartment when we were gone.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
You don't make any sense
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