Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
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