Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
Randomize