Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Randomize
