I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
I can text with my tongue
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
i just woke up with two martini umbrellas taped to my nipples... idk how they got there
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
Randomize
