oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
Randomize
