Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
Randomize
