The maid of honor just puked.
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
I just got carded by a ten year old.
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
