He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
Randomize
