I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
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