Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
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